Posted in Crystal S. Kauffman

Avoid Click, Click…Boom Moments!


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By, Crystal S. Kauffman

There are going to be times when you will find out certain things that may hurt or upset you about someone you love. Focus on maintaining your composure and gather your thoughts before you decide to react to the revelation. Sometimes, you must deal with the pain of knowing the truth. Stay silent, but inside you are putting different things together about a person that you have never noticed before.

Each new frame that rolls in your mind will be different snapshots and memories that you have stored in your mind over time. As the pictures, conversations, and actions begin to line up perfectly like a jigsaw puzzle. Honestly, you are now fast approaching an uncontrollable angry explosion, which is known as a click, click…boom moment! Unfortunately, you know the truth based on your own perception of what you have seen or heard.

These thoughts stir up your anger, while you fight to hold back the spontaneous combustion that you know is quickly coming. Stop allowing these thoughts to dominate your mind, instead distract yourself with watching funny videos or listening to upbeat music. Don’t focus on the pain you feel, instead be thankful that you now know the absolute truth and start changing your part in the narrative of your story.

Walk away and let it go, because it is not healthy to hold anger in or to allow it to fester due to the pain you feel at this moment. Stay strong and keep moving away from them, until you are no longer part of their life. Try to identify or learn what triggers your angry outbursts and learn to let go for peace sakes. Remember that becoming angry is natural, but letting your temper explode on your family and friends is not.

Copyrighted 2019

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Posted in addiction, Change, crystal s. kauffman, Family, illness, Life

Changing Your Inner Circle


By, Crystal S. Kauffman

Are you living with an addictive personality, but you are sober right now? If so, then you need to change some keys things in your life right now! Separate yourself from everyone that will help feed your addiction, as well as anyone who chooses to use drugs themselves. Chase your sobriety like you chased the high that you craved from the drugs you chose to use.

Protecting yourself and your mind from bad influences that are lurking inside your inner circle truly is the only way to manage your addictions. Family and friends can influence you in ways that any other person could not. The only way to control your addictions is to stay away from those who are actively using. Honestly, you cannot just say that their use will not affect you, because it absolutely will tempt you.

Remember that you will always live with an addictive personality and you will need to manage your sobriety just like any other chronic disease. Recovery is possible, once you become honest with yourself and others. Asking for help is so vital to becoming and maintaining a sober lifestyle. Active remove people out of your life that have chosen to feed their addiction. Don’t give up and don’t stay anywhere near active users, because you will relapse.

You know these people are no longer someone you will want to hang around. Temptation is around every corner, so be sure to keep you inner circle drug free. After cleansing your inner circle, begin adding family and friends who are supportive and will hold you accountable when you start going down the wrong path again.
Cutting active users will help you, as you begin the brutal process of healing the pain that you were trying to numb with the drugs. Don’t be afraid to get help from a psychiatrist or counselor, since mental health issues can trigger a relapse. Fight for your life and sobriety, because choosing to feed your addiction may kill you.

Start protecting yourself by cutting all contact with active drug users and surround yourself with loved ones who encourage you to stay sober. There are support groups online that you can talk with anytime of the day and night. When you are struggling to make it through the day, just remember to breathe and get through the moment of weakness. Therefore, take an honest inventory of your friends and family members before their influence can poison your mind.

Copyrighted 2019

(I am not a licensed therapist. Based on my personal experience.)

Posted in addiction, anger, Change, Crystal Kauffman, Crystal S Kauffman, Crystal S. Kauffman, dancing with anger, Fight, forgive, Freelance writing, Healthy Living, imogen rayne, Life

Don’t Ring That Bell


My Uncle once told me that, “Sometimes our words ring a bell when we speak them out loud!”

An unbearable amount of pain can come from someone words, especially when they can literally cut a person’s heart to pieces. Sometimes, people are dealing with things that you may not know about, so be kind when you speak. Lately, I have been trying to watch my own mouth and not say mean things to anyone, since I have been trying to get right with God. However, some days I fail too and my anger erupts like a volcano and I am saying stuff I completely regret.

Do not say something if you don’t mean it, since not everyone will forgive you for the mean things you have said. Everyone can be very mean with their words, but you must change the way you react when you are angry at a person. Try to be quiet and say a prayer, whenever someone seems to be pushing all the right buttons and your anger is swelling. Take a deep breath or listen to your favorite music, which may help you calm down.

Don’t say something that you cannot take back, just because you are angry and someone is relentless and is constantly pushing you to your limit. The anger swells like the lava in a volcano and before long you are spewing venom from your lips. Instead, offer a prayer of forgiveness and try to get away from the person who brings the contempt out of you. Honestly, don’t let your anger cause you to say things that you will one day end up regretting for the rest of your life.

I always try to remember what my Uncle always said when he was alive, “Don’t Ring That Bell, Christy!”

©2019, Crystal S. Kauffman

PS: I am not a Licensed Therapist! Based on Personal Experience

Posted in anger, Crystal S. Kauffman, dancing with anger, forgivness, God, Poetry

Dancing With Anger


By, Crystal S. Kauffman, Staff Writer

©Unknown
©Unknown

Give me this moment father,
I don’t want to be a bother.
Calm the rage I feel,
Love me, as I start to heal.

I will not complain or cry,
Watch me as I fly.
Tomorrow I will grow my wings,
Start to fly and handle things.

I made my own prison of sin,
Some blame what I grew up in,
Never knowing love that I should,
Most of my life I felt misunderstood.

Holding on to a dream will all my might,
Standing against the odds I will fight.
To stubborn to give up or to quit,
No matter the blow or the hit.

Not even cancer can take my desire,
Or my passion that burns like a fire.
Burning my soul, as I face this pain,
My eyes are left with tears that stain.

Your love is what I have inside,
So, therefore I will not hide.
I will stand and take all I can,
With you holding my hand.

Lost and pushing straight,
Patiently, I will forever wait.
Nothing can stop me now,
Only you can show me how.

Life is hard, without you here,
Take my soul and hold it near.
I don’t know what my future will hold,
Please, don’t let my anger leave me cold.

PS: I wrote this poem in 2008, when I was dealing with a lot of anger for various reasons. I have learned to forgive and I feel so relieved that I do not feel this way anymore. However, you may be dancing with you own anger. I hope this poem speaks to you and allows you to forgive on make peace with those you are angry at. You don’t forgive for them, instead you forgive for yourself.

Posted in anger, Crystal S. Kauffman, health, Mental health, stress, stress management

Mental Health & Stress Level Can Affect Your Overall Health


By, Crystal S. Kauffman, Staff Writer

©Unknown
©Unknown

Stress can have different affects on the human body, which is why there is not a one medication or approach to handling mental stresses in life. Some people try using stress management techniques, but they don’t always work. Whenever, you are in the stressful situation, sometimes these techniques you have learned will help. Other times, they don’t work and you may get angry at the situation you are in that is causing stress or depression.

Therefore, there are other tips and tricks that someone can try, in order to relieve their anxiety or stress. The stress management techniques focus on helping a person change themselves or their situation whenever they can. However, sometimes a person cannot change a stressful in their life for didn’t reason. These situations can cause too much stress and anxiety, which may lead to a depressive mood.

A person needs to change their way thinking and behavior, when learning healthier ways to cope with the situation. They begin by changing their thoughts, their lifestyle, emotions, and the way the react to certain situations. However, some people need other ways to alleviate stress like: physical activity, keeping a journal, medication, and prayer or spiritual help. Keeping a stress journal can help patient or the doctor to discover exactly what the stress triggers are and how they can avoid those stresses all together.

Some people will need medication to help their anxiety level, while other can do simple breathing exercises. Many people just need to take time out of their busy day and stop to relax while smelling the roses. The patient can get on the right treatment plan and start their journey towards feeling better. Additionally, the patient’s mental health and stress level can make them sick and cause other issues like: anxiety or depression.

A person should never be afraid to ask for help, because they just might find healthier ways to handle stressful situations. Learning new coping techniques can help lessen the stress level that a person is dealing with. An overwhelming stress can affect a person’s mental and physical health, but exercise and learning healthy coping skills can help alleviate stress. Therefore, it is important for people of all ages to see a doctor, whenever they are feeling overwhelmed by the stresses in their life.

Personal Experience

©2015, Crystal S. Kauffman

Posted in Crystal S. Kauffman, Devotional

Devotional: Get Over It and Move On


angry control itSometimes you will find yourself in a situation that you don’t want to be in, however, you must face the situation and continue moving forward. The situation may concern having a horrible childhood, not getting a promotion at work, or a dispute with the new neighbor. Nevertheless, you must not dwell on things and are beyond your control, instead focus on things you can change. You cannot change a childhood, so you must forgive your parents and focus on changing your future. This way, future generations will not continue the abuse or neglect that you felt as a child.

The promotion at work was given to a younger person, who may not have had as many years with the company as you have. However, this is beyond your control and the person who got the promotion may have a college degree that you don’t have. In this situation, you must continue to do the job that you’re given or find another place of employment. Either way, you must forgive your boss and the person who got the promotion, if you have gotten angry about the situation or angry with both parties.

Furthermore, you can work hard and take some college courses, which may guarantee that you will not be passed over whenever the next promotion takes place. If you have a dispute with your new neighbor, you must try to dissolve this dispute in a civil yet timely manner. Unfortunately, some people are impossible to deal with and that will not come to any kind of compromise. So therefore, try to stop the argument, by producing all documents that show your land line or what the argument was about. Additionally, you must forgive you neighbor and move forward in solving the issue at hand.

Sometimes this means, you must compromise or even seek legal advice on solving the problem. However, you must forgive your neighbor, if you get angry with him and let God handle the situation. Don’t let yourself stay in a pity party, instead get up and change your situation. Sometimes you are going to come across situations that you can’t change. Therefore, you must learn to pray and give your problems to God, because he is only one who can change the situation. Don’t be a negative person, because of something that was done to you, which was beyond your control. Additionally, get over it and dwell on things that can change your situation, while helping you move forward in your life.

©2012 Crystal S. Kauffman

Previously Published

always angry

Posted in author, Change, college, Crystal S Kauffman, Devotional, imogen rayne

Get Over It and Move On


burdens

Sometimes you will find yourself in a situation that you don’t want to be in, however, you must face the situation and continue moving forward. The situation may concern having a horrible childhood, not getting a promotion at work, or a dispute with the new neighbor. Nevertheless, you must not dwell on things and are beyond your control, instead focus on things you can change. You cannot change a childhood, so you must forgive your parents and focus on changing your future. This way, future generations will not continue the abuse or neglect that you felt as a child.

The promotion at work was given to a younger person, who may not have had as many years with the company as you have. However, this is beyond your control and the person who got the promotion may have a college degree that you don’t have. In this situation, you must continue to do the job that you’re given or find another place of employment. Either way, you must forgive your boss and the person who got the promotion, if you have gotten angry about the situation or angry with both parties.

Furthermore, you can work hard and take some college courses, which may guarantee that you will not be passed over whenever the next promotion takes place. If you have a dispute with your new neighbor, you must try to dissolve this dispute in a civil yet timely manner. Unfortunately, some people are impossible to deal with and that will not come to any kind of compromise. So therefore, try to stop the argument, by producing all documents that show your land line or what the argument was about. Additionally, you must forgive you neighbor and move forward in solving the issue at hand.

Sometimes this means, you must compromise or even seek legal advice on solving the problem. However, you must forgive your neighbor, if you get angry with him and let God handle the situation. Don’t let yourself stay in a pity party, instead get up and change your situation. Sometimes you are going to come across situations that you can’t change. Therefore, you must learn to pray and give your problems to God, because he is only one who can change the situation. Don’t be a negative person, because of something that was done to you, which was beyond your control. Additionally, get over it and dwell on things that can change your situation, while helping you move forward in your life.